First of all, YOU! You are the reason for your success and failure, as a human you have the luxury to make your decisions and freedom of choice. Even if your environment is toxic, you have the strength to work on yourself, for yourself, and with yourself.
However, if procrastination strikes then things could be difficult. But, let us not neglect the fact that some environment has nothing to do with us even with your efforts, such as your home. A part from this, 95% of the success reasons belong to you, some of them are;
1. Your habits- You represent your habits in your regular activities and decision-making. From the way you talk to the way you walk, everything is a combines to be a group of habits. Success requires productive habits and highly qualified discipline
2. Learning- In relationship to the above reason, learning is what will contribute to your success. There are two sorts of people, judgers & seekers. And most people are always in judging mode, rather you should be in a seeking mode, and there is more to it.
Not everything is good to learn, so filter out unnecessary information and only focus on beneficial learning.
3. Discipline- Not to become successful, but to start the journey. First, you need to discipline yourself. Discipline starts from planning your day to doing whatever it takes to achieve what you wrote down as your task list. It includes compromises, efforts productivity, and going on to your health consciousness.
Moreover, being disciplined tend to decrease indecent habits and unnecessary urges by itself. If you are doing what you like, that doesn’t count on discipline alone, but if you are giving up unnecessary things to do what you intended for, that is discipline.
4. Skill- As we talked about the importance of learning, it should be converted into a skill. But firstly, it is important to seek the right skill for the right purpose.
If you love swimming, there is no logic in learning how to draw a plan for a skyscraper. So, what you want to achieve will determine what essential skills you need.
5. UAC (Unique ability circle)- We don’t need to learn everything, if we do, we would kill our goals before they even come alive. By nature, every single person on earth has their unique ability circle, and that is quite apparent to everyone.
We only need to stick to those skills. There might be 2,3 or 4 unique skills you are born with, or you can lead with. Going out of the circle would create unpleasant results.
Elon Musk doesn’t build rockets, he has hired a team of professionals who have building skills in their UAC. But all of this doesn’t mean to live a dry day, be the master of your skills.
6. Positive mindset- A hard truth, early success is a scam! Success is not easy, and it won’t come easy even if you call it hundred times a day. Think of that famous girl in college that drives everyone’s attention and respond to very selective people.
If you go to her, beg her to be with you, it won’t work. But what if you build the right attitude, make mature approaches, and build values in yourself, she would like to interact with you.
Success is that famous girl! It only comes to those who are suitable and who can handle it with grace. (By the way, if you would have a strong ethical personality, you wouldn’t beg her in the first place)
7. Goals- Getting out of bed without goals is getting out of your grave in a world you don’t belong to. If you are an employee, be aware of the fact that you are working on someone else’s goals.
It is totally fine to be an employee, the job is an essential part of life, but simultaneously realizing your goals and attempting to work on them won’t hurt you.
Earlier in this journal we talked about ‘How do you define success. So, define your goals, and realize a significant part of 24hr day shall feed the journey to your goals.
8. No need to know it all As similarly as we don’t need to learn everything, we also don’t need to know everything! Before getting on the path of your goals, and extent of knowledge particular to your desired field would be great.
However, spending too much time on micro details would not help you. Just follow what Nike says ‘Just do it, and you will learn everything you need along the journey.
How your environment could affect your mental health?
Before going into it, we must realize it is our mental health that drives our success. Physical health also plays a huge part, but mostly the quality of our life is dependent on our mental health. A person with six abs taking anti-depressants 3 times a day would collapse if he comes into a fight with someone.
The abstract environment has a huge impact on our mental health, even a materialistic environment is effective, such as a research study claimed Places with bright light and off-white shades tend to decrease anxiety and depression.
However, the most essential is the social environment, the surroundings with which you spend a significant time with.
People have different mindsets, different sort of communication styles, and parameters to accept other people in their lives. I
f your work environment is not under good leadership, your skills might get bumped upon as there is no room for their acceptance, this could also lead to lower your self-esteem and build self-doubts.
If you have seen your parents fighting since childhood, it won’t take you longer to behave disrespectfully to another woman as well, if not, you might do the same with your children. The environment is a teacher that you seek from, and duplicate subconsciously in your life.
Surrounding yourself with people who are not self-confident would automatically make you believe you are not worthy as well.
Your environment determines the quality of your thoughts and how you perceive things. If your friends or work environment have a dominant personality, you will learn to surrender your abilities.
And all of these effects lead to your mental health, which could be lower self-esteem due to racism or dominant people. High tendency to have anxiety attacks if your surrounding is neglecting your perspectives and beliefs.
To maintain our mental health and quality to express ourselves, it’s important to surround yourself with a quality environment with positive mindsets and an environment which is capable to value your contributions as an individual.
How can you change your environment to become successful?
You must put an eye on your environment. As it is affecting your mental health as well as building familiar habits. As we discussed earlier, your habits determine your life’s standard.
So, the ultimate goal to change your environment would be to acquire the quality habits required for success. But keep in mind success doesn’t come overnight. However, your environment might be an obstacle in your transformation, and let’s discuss how to deal with your environment;
1. Write down the habits you think are an obstacle- It is the first step. Writing down target habits to change will clearer your mind for your next decisions and it will make it easier for you to gain realization.
2. Think of the people who have the same habits- This is filtering out your environment. After realizing your toxic or unnecessary habits, make a list of those people who have the same habit or who you might think could be the reason to strengthen these habits.
3. Filter out bad communicators- You must think for a moment and search for people who don’t pay attention to listening to you in gatherings, those are the people who might give birth to your lack of self-confidence.
4. Decrease the amount of time you spend with those people and instead spend the rest of your time with yourself doing your things.
5. Make it easy for yourself- If you crave to be with them so much, just video call, physical appearance, in the same manner, would stop you to develop. Be less available!
6. Gradually change the environment- You must change the place you spend a significant time, to find the right people.
If you want to get rid of anxiety and depression, you might need positive and healthier people around, so you may join a gym as people who are regular in the gym are more friendly and good communicators. And also, exercising tends to increase the value of self-care.
Also, if it’s hard for you to go to the gym in the early stages, bring the dumbbells at home. This approach will set a pre-environment in your subconscious mind for your regular exercise.
7. Begin writing regular tasks that serve your goals. This activity will subconsciously make you responsible for yourself and thus the day would be engaging and distractions from the toxic environment would appear less.
8. Write down 7 things you are grateful for It doesn’t matter if you don’t drive a Ferrari, you still breathe and sleep. Writing down things you are grateful for tends to eliminate negative thoughts and fear of the future, thus giving you a heads-up for your journey to an enhanced mindset.
9. Spend more time with yourself doing a productive activity- If you don’t spend time with yourself, it means you don’t like yourself. Spending quality, time by reading books or watching informational videos on social media gets you into a well-qualified thought process.
10. Avoid the triggers- There are always some triggers for our anxiety attacks or bad decisions, nothing is random, even if you feel it's random, it isn’t.
So the most important thing you can do for yourself is to realize what triggers you, when you find it, you will automatically avoid that trigger and the environment that promotes that trigger in the first place.
TREAT- Just to understand your value in your social circle. Stop texting/calling at first for a while and observe. You will realize how many dead plants you were watering.
Your work environment is essentially creating an impact on your present and future, however, you might not be aware of whether its being toxic or not.